*what should i do?!*

I was just talking to this man...he's...he's...confusing me...and now, I really do not know what's the right thing to do.

argh...

I hope thai boy can help solve some problems for me tonight...I'll talk to him tonight...to find that correct answer...

*confused*

The Mortar Board

I just had my once-in-a-lifetime convocation last month. But i've been so busy it felt like ages since the convocation.

I missed my poly graduation...and this uni convocation is a MUST-go for me! :)

Tho' I din make it to the dean's list, not even anywhere near the 'distinction' mark but I'd still like to thank people around me who made it possible...

I think this mortar board & certificate do not really belong to me...I'd like to dedicate this degree and of cos the rests of my certificates to my dear papa and mama! Without their $$$, their sacrifices and their wish for me to succeed and go far in life, I wouldn't have achieved what I did! :)

And of cos, all those close and dear to me, like my bro, the bf, my gf, etc...THANK YOU!

Bye, the-rest-of-the-year...Hello, November & December!

As usual, and I guess it hits everyone the same...As 31 Dec are slowly creeping towards us, it finally dawned on us how fast the past year whizzed by...

Here we are again! Less than 2 weeks to the time of the year - X'mas!

And I thought I have to wait so long for my convocation. And that long wait to the end of my medication, not to forget, working towards the end of my contract that seemed to be so far away...

WOW! And now we're in our last few weeks of 2007, it's probably time to look back at what our resolutions were, which are those that we still have yet to accomplish and get those things done with this last bit of time left!

Ahhh...too many things on hand and too little time we have!!! Every week seemed to be soooo packed!

Just came back from my 'trip of 2007'! So happy that I managed to meet so many nice people! keke! Nice and 'Correct' people, I'd say...Haha!
Woohoo! So i've got the approval to go Terangganu next yr...and Taipei in 2009!
Of cos, many other factors to consider nearer the dates...But at least, the top people have already given me a 'thumbs-up'! COOL! :)

Am so looking forward to 2009 now! whooosh...time should fly by! :)

stepping out...of my centre...

A series of events just got me so super pissed that i start to wonder why...
- must i be the one to go out of my way to get back my things when it was me who lent it out...
- must i always have to plan for somethings (sometimes all the way) to get a message from others to say it's either done or cancelled?!

ok, i know it's too self-centred...

Ask not what can the country do for you. Ask what YOU can do for the country...

maybe i should stop dwelling into these and step out of my centre...maybe then, i can be a better person...

hold my hands...till end of time?

I like the idea of partners holding hands even when they're old already.
I like that.
I want it.

Well, need not hold my hand till we're old if we/one-of-us die early. Haha!
Probably just hold my hand till the end of time. :)

If that is not going to happen...erm...then how?! I have to die before the partner stops holding my hand?

Argh...Tough one...Let me think about it...Maybe that's the only good solution to it...

the imaginery parking lot...

Sometimes I park at this 'imaginery' lot at my place's carpark...

Why 'imaginery'? Haha! Cos there isn't really a lot there...
Just that it seems like there just aren't many lots for bikes at my area and having no lots to park, people just 'self-extended' the lots next to the real ones...

Well, if people does that, I guess I can also, right?
And of cos, I naively think that the 'nice & kind' attendants will not summon me...

Then just approximately a month ago, I got a $25 summon! *kill me*
$25 is alot for a bike!

And approximately a month last (few days back), the STUPID (pls pardon me...) i-dont-know-who drew REAL lots on the imageinery lots area!
Took so long to do that! ARGH! Could have saved my $25!

*breathe in* *breathe out*

The weekend's over again?! It's MONDAY again?!
omg! omg!

Feels like a very short weekend this week...
Did not do much things, but time seemed to fly! (my colleague corrected me...he said in this era, time don't fly, they rocketed away!)

Anyway, pretty interesting weekend...
Found out some interesting stuffs...

No. 1

I found my no. 2 fan!
Kekeke!
I have my fans when it comes to interpreting...(I decided to 'crown' them my fans! Haha! narcissistic devil is out again)
Well, I think & maybe...erm...sorry, i mean i insist that the bf should be my no. 1 fan!
Anyway, he is my 'shifu' (master/teacher)...The one who taught me sign almost from scratch...
And during the weekend, I found my no. 2 fan! None other than my grand-shifu!
Heehee! She may not even know she's my grand-shifu la...But given the level & depth of her knowledge, we call her my shifu's shifu, and that makes her my grand-shifu
But I think she's my no. 2 fan! :)

To me, signing is pretty subjective...Just like being a DJ or a show host...
Different people just enjoy different style of speaking...
Same with signing, different people enjoy different styles...Keke!
And my 2 fans liked mine... *blushed*

No. 2

I'm beginning to list down the people who are 'nagging' at me to take care of myself, how to take care of myself, etc...
No hard feelings...
In fact, they warm my heart...
Some of them are not very close friends, but the way they show their concern, I'm amazed!
And of cos, touched...very touched...
And I feel so loved...Kekeke! *awwwwww....*

Ok, list of them...Not in any order and/or preference... :)

• my dear sister, J, has always been so caring towards me...Keke!
• grand-shifu, I can actually 'see' her concerned expression when the bf told her what happened to me...Keke!
• my gf of cos! Keke! came with a pretty sunflower knowing, even though, that I'd scold her, she bought it too! Keke!
• my new gf too! :) who came to visit me with a delicious pear (the pear was really really tasty!) when I was hospitalized...
• medium D, who will always always nag at me! Haha! And enjoys it so much when everyone else nags at me together then he'll stand at the corner and laugh at me being nagged at! Keke!
• busy bee, the ultimate nagging machine (she'll kill me if she sees this!), nag and nag! Hahahahah! Almost non-stop....
• dragonboat manager J, also so concerned about me...
• a new found one last weekend, 4D QUEEN! Keke! nag non-stop! but the best part is she nags at the bf too! keke! so i dont feel so 'victimized'! Keke!
• and of cos, how can I miss him out? my deaf bf...hahah! though he don't usually express it or say it out, but he nearly box me when I told 4D Queen that he's not worried & will not get too upset if anything happened to me...Hahahaha! Got me laughing upside down...Lucky never really box me! *phew*
• not to forget, also people who used to be closer to me...should they know what happened, they will be very very concerned... :)
• and my family! :)

so, i guess, these are little things in my life that makes a HUGE difference...people who touched my heart and warms it...

thank YOU so much, my dear friends for caring, for being around, for nagging, for making me feel so loved! :)

narcissistic side of me... :)

Funny stuffs friends say about me...

• junk food nation...diet: anything deep fried & unhealthy...dream on about seeing any greens on her plate..
• you look like i just walked out of a comic strip
• you are like some cartoon character...erm...dunno wat...but u are just very funny la...
• your heckcare attitude...hai... *shakes head*
• was: what?! you study accounting?!
• now: what?! you doing accounts?! what you doing there?! haha! *as if it's a joke...* (if it's a joke, it's a bad one, people...kekekek!)
• angie's always so happy & excited when she's at mcDonalds! don't know why... (for this, i decided, i'm still a mcDonalds' kid...haven't grow out of it yet...)

These are all that I can recall for now...Keke!
Will add in if more comes to my mind... :)

pissed to the max

I'm very very pissed with this particular person...
*argh*

Pissed to the max...

Finally understand how people can get so angry that their blood vessels burst...
Why?
Today is the second time I've experienced this...The first time happened not too long ago, probably 2 - 3 weeks back.
Can actually feel the blood gushing to the head and then the groggi-ness set in...

I know it's not a big issue...Just pissed...Sorry, I would like to correct it...
It should SUPER pissed...

Ahhh...forget it...It's really not so worth my anger...

-_-

go MAD today!

I've to do something about my blog...
Gf is complaining that the blog is dying yet again! kekeke!

Okok, I thought about what to blog today...And I think this is what I wanna blog about! :)

I saw a book on my table today, Well, it's been there for the longest time, just that somehow I saw it again this morning...
And it stuck to my head...
The title? "Positively MAD"...
(kekeke! compliments from MAD people of cos!)

On my way to work this morning, I thought about it...
To be positively MAD...

To me, sometimes MAD is an overused word...
Used too often, and not always acted on...

Then I recalled an email sent by an ex-colleague few years ago...That was the first time I heard of MAD...
She was walking to the office from the MRT station and there were a few of these MAD pple who stood by the MRT stations, giving out flyers that say "Would you be MAD today?"
I can't recall the exact contents of the email nor could I remember what the flyers are about. And of cos, the email ended with "Would you be MAD today?"

To me, there are many many many different ways to go MAD...Different people does it differently...
And this morning, coincidentally or not, I read a Chicken Soup article talking about a lady who gives encouragement to a fellow patient in the hospital...
And of cos, chicken soup being chicken soup, it ended off something like 'encourage someone everyday'...This is how that patient chose to go MAD...She encourages...

It's really true...Sometimes when it's a bad day, the worst day of your life (or so you thought) and it helps with a bit of smile and some encouraging words...
Someone may say something like 'nice hair!' 'nice shirt!' or even, 'good day!'
It's short, it's simple, and sometimes, that's all that's needed...

Let's not wait no more!
Be a Star to someone today! oops! (overdose of the campaign... =P)
I mean, go MAD today, people!
Do it in your own way...
Smile! Say something nice to at least 3 persons (it's not that tough, is it?)! :)

It's not that tough to make someone's day!

the right things with the right thoughts?

It's blogging day again!
Haha! It's another Friday today...Time seems to fly...It's already June! *wow!*

This thing that I'm going to share has been in my mind for a long long time...
Let me share my thoughts...

Well, I've been volunteering (in no particular organization, but just my time spent volunteering ) since year 2000...
And since then, I've had people coming to me with things like:
- "Wow! You so good ah! Helping people...Heart so good..."
- "Good work! Helping those who need!"
- "It must be tough to squeeze time out for these activities, good good!"

And of cos, there are more...keke!

When these come to me, I'm usually at a loss...Guess the humble Chinese in me just replied off handedly: "Haha! No la...No la..."

Just a thought into the whole thing...Sometimes, I'd say doing what I do, volunteering, helping out when I can is actually not something GREAT to me.
In fact, being human, sometimes we do things for a reason (motive to be exact?)...
Am I actually bringing laughter, food and warmth to these special people or am I there and doing all these because what I do gives me a sense of satisfaction, warmth, comfort, etc?
Not forgetting the company and friendship...

So was it for them that I volunteer & spent my time or was it for my own selfish reasons? I wonder...

If it was all for the selfish reasons...Then am i as great and as giving/generous as what people make me out to be when they said what they say...

Maybe it isn't that bad...In the very least, we achieved the win-win situation, isn't it?
But is the motive right? Was it out of giving that we started giving? Hmmmm...?! I continue to ponder...

Weekend's over?! So fast?!

It's the time of the day again!

"What time?"

"Blogging time!"

Haha! It's monday again, what happened to the weekend that swoshed by?!
Super tired & sleepy today...Like gf said...Maybe no job fit that's why la...everyday so tired...Kinda ridiculous...Haha!

Haha! I've been like the talk of office ever since I'm back... But I'm fine la... Understand that people are worried and are curious about it...
Some act like experts on the subject matter, sharing their knowledge on how to identify the germs are in them, others are super duper jumpy...
Some that have been diagnosed with the germs and put in medication a down, others take things as they come...

Sometimes things just don't turn out as expected...There have been four in my office that have been disgnosed with the germs and put on medication so far...
However, these four are those who I don't really talk to, don't work together, and just happen to sit in the same office... And they don't even sit anywhere near!
*amazed* haha! maybe TB germs fly...Keke!
And this other lady even mentioned that she'll not go for the test, cos it makes no sense...Even if you're tested negative now, you may get it anytime, cos it's not an antibody...plus, what's the point of going there to allow them (TB unit) to inject TB germs in your body?! Haha! I get her point la...It's up to her, I guess... :)

Well, people talk about it so openly that last week, I had a colleague who asked me openly & loudly "Hey, Angie, you stress or not? Everyone talking about you leh!"
Haha! What can I say...Honestly, I really don't feel weird or what not la...Just that sometimes I don't know what's the best expression to give...
Eg. this guy is diagnosed with TB germs, and is put on medication...And he's so upset about it...So so so upset! And the thing is I dunno him well and don't even talk to him...And so, I haven nothing to talk to him about, nothing to tell him...So I act blur lor... *faint*

Besides all these (which are not that bad), everything's alrite, I guess...
Weekend's tiring & I din manage to get enough rest...

And somethings that I really wanna start doing...
I want to really start taking in Malay vocabs...I have to start somewhere...
& I need some exercise...It's a NEED...

My life...My next few years...

Just read my new gf's blog...Haha! Kinda set me thinking la...

Haha! She talks about 'what you see yourself in 2, 5, 10 yrs time', about being a workaholic...etc...
Haha! These are the few things that caught me la...

For me, these two issues are related...Why? Cos I really think I can be a workaholic, but that really depends on what the work is about...
My current job? Well, it just doesnt give me enough satisfaction to be a workaholic...I really dont feel for it...
Haha! Oh well, the money is pretty good...I cant complain, can I?
But just sharing from my heart, it' really does not give me any incentive (besides money) to over work...I dont feel good working more, and most of all, I dun feel for it!
Erm, so what if we pay all the suppliers on time? So what if all the invoices are in place?
I know the basics of how a company works...I understand that I'm playing a small part in a big production...Without the Accounts dept, the company will have a hard time functioning...I know...I know...But I just don't feel for it (I'm sure you know what I mean)...
I guess even if I were doing Accounts in an organization I feel for (maybe like a VWO whom cause I advocate for), I'm pretty sure I won't enjoy it...
But probably one consolation that I have is that at least this company I'm working with is doing something meaningful...At least we're producing really useful & meaning things...

Was talking to a very-logical-friend the other day, 'Of cos you sould just stay and cont'd working there la! They pay not bad, benefits good, near your home! Good enough la! Don't work those no money, no future jobs la!' *faint* but I knpw what to expect him to say la...Keke!
I can't deny that he's got a good point there...But I guess he's right for now...I really NEED the cash...

But I know this is really not what I wanna do...I want to walk out of this...and into something I feel for...something I advocate for...
Sometimes I wonder if i can survive without savings, with no money, with just what I have on my back...So I can put my everything down for those in need...
Hai...Sometimes I wonder it's because we're in Singapore that's why we can't do that...I know it's not...It's pride...

The tough part is to put down my pride then to serve wholeheartedly...

Anyway, it's another wonderful and pretty FRIDAY in our lives! Embrace it! :)

Mid-week!

It's another sleepy day at work today...
But gf is right...every work day is sleepy for me...I seriously think it's because of the work la...my kind of work is the sit-down-and-work kind....stare at computer, look busy is part of the job...Haha! But today's worse! Woke up in the morning, eyes cant open fully..Once I arrive office I have to find a place to shut my eyes...Think I have to continue to do that every hour for today! =(
And gf's not in office today...No email chat today...

Anyway, think I should just blog a little today lest my gf says 'your blog also natural death ah? *giggle*'...Keke!

I always try to my mind busy while riding cos if not, I'll get bored...
Most of the time left with nothing in particular to think about, I start pondering what I should/can blog about! Haha! Many times the thought just ended there.
After I got to my destination, the thought dissolved and probably got blown somewhere...Keke!

Gf just came back from china (heehee! a lonely trip to china...), though it wasnt a fun trip (and in truth it's a trip, i guess, that she doesnt want to embark on ever again!), when she came back, she still somehow wished she wasnt back...why? cos once she's back, work flocked to her mind...it became stressful once she landed...
Heehee! I can understand that, though it doesnt apply to be as of now...

I read somewhere
"I learnt something very important. Escape through travel works. Almost from the moment I boarded my flight, life back home became meaningless. Seat belt signs lit up, problems switched off. Broken armrests took precedence over broken hearts. By the time the plane was airborne I'd forgotten England even existed...." (the guy's probably from England)

And I think it's really really true...
Call me coward, but sometimes it's really true...Of cos sometimes it's not...Some said "The world is round, wherever you go, problems follow right behind you."
I've heard from a friend about a friend who escaped from Spore all the way to Oz to run away from some problems...When she got there, she realized that the world is indeed round...She finally decided to face her problems there.

Heehee!

Written on weds, 16 May

it's been a long time... =)

"Havent been blogging..." this is one sentence that I always see in people's blogs...Haha! Now it's happening to me...Gf asks if my blog had a natural death too (hers died...natural death.)...Of cos Not! Mine's just hibernating...Keke!

Anyway, I've thought of many things to blog about actually, ever since I was hospitalized...But everytime when I sat down in front of the computer, I don't know where to start...HEehee! That explains why...

Alrite, think I should blog about my very first hospital stay...I started coughing blood, that's what got me to the doc then to the A&E then to the hospital...Haha! Yeah, it's a bit like how it's like on tv...Someone holds a hankie to the mouth when coughing then suddenly you see blood and ponders what could it be...keke!
Hospital stay wasnt that bad...besides that fact that for the first two days I had this needle stuck into me...Keke! But besides that and the lousy food, it not really that bad...But sometimes instead of getting more rest, somemore you get more tired than usual...Probably from the lack of moving, lethargy develops?

But nice people visit me and make things more fun, talking to me, kill some time...Hehe! One unexpected visitor, and few other expected ones...But still, it was a pretty nice experience (i know it's weird putting it this way...but it's really like this! =P)... =)

Anyway, finally back to work after three weeks of rest! But still sleepy...Cos I din sleep well last night...Probably thinking (unconsciously) about how my colleagues are going to react to me after three weeks of disappearance...Keke! Oh well, as of now, I'd say everyone has been great! Think it's hugely because of the way this co. handled the situation. They make it easy for the staff as well as myself. Well, i'm just lucky, i guess! :)

So well, it's back to work for me now...
Work's pretty much the same la...stapler stapler, chop chop chop! Haha!
But this two weeks going to be little busy with the book launch at the back of my head...Will need to work on it...The final mile...
Our baby's finally coming out...after a year...Haha!

That's for now!

One relationship that I really appreciate... =)

One relationship that I really appreciate is one that the bf has with the gf!
It's really wonderful! If you've ever experienced something like that or seen something like that...well, it just warms your heart...really!

For the benefit of all who reads my blog (erm...actually I only know the bf & the gf are my only fan...but...heck!), the gf is my super buddy, literally my gf...keke! Eh! I walk to bus stop look for her one, ok? (tho' we sometimes walked round and round searching for the right way..keke!) =)
And the bf, of course, is my other half... =)

The way the both of them care for each other (in their own ways) is pretty sweet...
Think I'll give examples of what they've done to exhibit this...

E.g.1
The bf has some ladies shoes on hand to sell/give away...And he saw a pair that he thinks the gf will like...
And he keeps that pair specially for gf! (and I din even get any pair of shoes, mind you! Haha! Cos the shoes were all so not me...keke!)

E.g.2
The gf and I plan for some outing and the gf will never hesitate to include the bf in our fun (or just to help finish our food...kekeke!)!

E.g.3
The bf and I were planning to make a trip back to our 2nd home with two other friends...The bf asked the gf to come along...But at the same time is little worried if she'll be bored if she comes along...

E.g.4
The gf and I always try to plan for trips/outings and the gf never fail to include the bf in our plans... =)

Ahhh...there are just so many little thoughts that they had for each other...
Well, for one, it doesn't split me...Three of us could hold hands and have fun together... =)

And it just warms my heart when one of them considered the other in our plans!

Thank you, my dear bf! =)
Thank you, my dear gf! =)

P/s: And to add to that, both of them gets along pretty well with everyone else! Kekeke! =)

What comes around goes around...

There are times when I chat with my friends about other friends (ok, B***H! But u see, we dont talk about how BAD the person is...we talk about general things...ok...B***h is the right word...)...

And sometimes a sad story about these people comes into the conversation...
Those who know me well enough will know that I'd say "Well, he/she gotta step out of it him/herself...It's something no one can help...If he/she wants to stay in that ditch...No one can pull him/her out...Really..."

I guess the best friends can do is just to be around...be there for him/her to cry on, be there to laugh with, be there to s***e with, etc...

At the end of the day, it's very very much up to the person him/herself...

The moment of truth came when I wasnt very 'up' the other day...
This friend of mine told me 'well, you gotta get out of it yourself...no one can help you...'

1) I'm pretty sure this friend of mine do not know that this always come to my mind when I hear sad story...
2) And I'm sure this friend of mine really dont know me well enough...

Haha! It's certainly sounded different when this is told to me at the point in time...Part irritated, part laughing at myself...

Well said, my friend!

The EMPTY week...

I came to work on Mon thinking "ok, what's up for this week?"
Kinda excited about what's gonna happen this week!
Last week's been pretty busy, short week, rushing here and there from Mon til Thurs and ta-da! It's the long weekend...

So, here I was, e-chatting with my gf...Thinking about what's up for me this week and what's the 'friday' to look out for...
I thought the week is pretty filled up...I thought I had something on on Mon...But just couldnt recall what...
Nightmare turned to reality when I opened my 'everyday superhero' organizer...

Mon-BLANK!
Tue-BLANK!
Wed-BLANK!
Thur-BLANK
Fri-BLANK!
Sat-BLANK!
Sun-BLANK!

OMG OMG OMG!

I freaked out and wailed (or did I whine?) to gf...Oh no, this week super boring...It's an empty week...OMG!
Help, gf! You have to hold my hand lor! I DONT CARE!
Keke!

Well, today's Friday again and I guess I got through the week safe and sound and definitely not empty at all...
Lots of rest(s) (that does not include alot of boredom at home), great meetups, wonderful hang outs, survived being in between BIG BIG lorries/trucks a few times this week...
Tmr's kinda planned already...Sun's taking shape too...
I guess this week had been fantastic.. =)

But then again, looking at the organizer for next week's empty squares...
Instead of getting so upset...I guess I should just take it as things comes...
A friend just sms-ed me the other day 'Dont get so worried, dont think so much. Just enjoy the moment...'

Yes, that's what I think I should do...Though I really dont want an empty week...And cant stand the fact of not doing anything, not having any Fridays in mind...
Keke!

It's FRIDAY!!! =)

*quotes on what my friend(s) said arent the exact words

Saying NO to No

Isn’t it high that someone got negative about negativity? Yes, it is. Look around. The world is full of things that, according to nay-sayers, should never have happened.

‘Impossible’ ‘Impractical’ ‘No’ and yet ‘Yes’ ‘Yes’ ‘Yes’, continents have been found. Yes, men have played golf on the moon. Yes, straw is being turned into biofuel to power cars. Yes, yes, yes.

What does it take to turn no into yes? Curiousity. An open mind. A willingness to take risks. And, when the problem seems most insoluble, when the challenge is hardest, when everyone else is shaking their heads to say. Let’s go.

Advertisement by Shell. Found this in a magazine. Pretty interesting, eh?

How often did we get overwhelmed by negativity? Becoming this pessimistic little wrench hiding by the dark corner? Let us try to keep thing up (even when they look like they're down)...To keep ourselves up! To say YES! To make it a better place for everyone! To make it a better world! To pass on the yes-spirit!

All the way, guys!

chanting...Yes! Yes! Yes...

destroyed...physically...

Everyday when I ride, I'll try to think of something to keep my mind busy. Should I be listening to the radio or the mp3, the time and/or riding distance will feel much shorter as I try to sing at the top of my voice to the songs playing or I'd be listening to what the DJs got to say on the radio.
However, music don't see me through my morning rides to work cos office is pretty near and I'm always rushing to work! Keke! So to keep my mind occupied, I usually think of what I should blog about for today or just keep my mind occupied with a certain 'friday' that I'm excited about...Haha! (My bosses ain't gonna be too happy if they see this!)

So, same thing happened today, while riding to work, I thought about what I could blog about today...
However, nothing really interesting came to mind...

So, let me just blog about today...and how I feel now...

I feel terrible now...On a scale of 1 - 10...Think I'm on 6? Not that bad...But I can feel it coming and it's gonna get worse...
I'm finally defeated...I think you got me, you virus!
I'm gulping water...(which have been the case since the last time I've seen the doc)
But I ran out of panadol...Just refuse to buy another packet...I've got so many of them at home...

I can't wait to go home and lie down on my bed...But I know it'll be at least another 10 - 11 hrs before I can do that...
Argh...
Falling sick before public holiday's no fun...

I'm tired...Just tired...This time, physically...

I wrote one long post for the blog the other day while waiting for some things to happen...And I din know what happened, the comp just decided that it needs a break...It restarts itself and there goes my blog...I thought of writing it all over again but it's just too tiring to do it...Is it suppose to be a bad thing? Or is it not?

Well, it's definitely not an entry that will colour your day and thoughts with bright and colourful colours...But it really describe how I felt at the start of the 'dreadful' (or is it not?) weekend...

I'm kind of glad that it din manage to get posted. =)

Today is monday, we're just done with weekend...This weekend seemed to pass so fast! I'd say, since work started, this is the fastest weekend! Before I realised, it's over!
Maybe cos it's filled with many stuffs and I'm really tired...I slept (haven't gotten enough of it), jumped up rushed somewhere, did somethings then rushed somewhere else, get other things done, rush back to another somewhere to get more things done...By the time I sat down and finally get to do nothing, I'm really really tired & stoning already...I think I went round Sg a few times...Been to North, South, East, West...wow!

Just to give u an idea how tired I was...I fell asleep in my jeans & the same shirt I wore on that hot and sweaty Saturday...Just too tired...
Last week proved to be a tiring week, both mentally and physically, with me abusing myself (no worries, I didnt try to kill myself or slash or anything like that...it was just s-till-i-die, and some others...kekeke!)...Sat night's sleep couldnt have been better! =)

After rowing on sunday (which is super duper tiring), three tired lads dragged themselves to meet the 'mafia boss' for some discussion...To my delight, the China thingy haven't gone through...But more surprises (or was it shock) came during the discussion...Guess we have to be on high alert on what's going to happen next, and see what's next for us...Do we want to carry on with so many unwelcomed surprises? Let's take it step by step and only light steps allowed! Just in case we sink too deep in...

Now for something happy!
The next friday to look forward to is literally the coming Friday! Public Holiday! woohoo! =)
*happy!*
Think it's getaway time! Can't wait to go back to my hometown! Buahahah! ={

-the m'sian PR-

Trans-Siberia Grand Tour

Been thinking of getting out...Out of sg...

Yes, India's the last place on my list, but it's also one of the most affordable places to go to. I think?
I'm thinking of doing it. With S$500. To try to 'bunk in' in India for the longest time...
Just a thought...

Then it struck me! I nearly forgot about my long-awaited trans-siberia trip! Oh my! Oh my! The thought of it makes me excited already!
A trip that I had always wanted to make. Across the continent. Think it'll be fun. Eye-opening.

Ahhh...All these, I guess are just the 'Fridays' ahead...Not for now...
Hmmm...Maybe 1 yr of saving up? 2009 for the 'Grand tour'? Hmmm...

I must think twice before spending unnecessary cash! Must keep this end in mind in the mind ALWAYS!

Must control...

My secret THANK YOUs...

Yesterday isn't a fantastic day...I have to admit it...

Today feels better! And I want to make it better! =)

These are not exact details...I briefly read through the some papers this morning and read about Microsoft partnering Society for the Physically Disabled (SPD). Something like to provide the clients with IT skills for better job employment or well, something along that line...I really can't recall...

And another that talks about think-it's-SPD-again...filing income tax for taxi drivers!
Wow! Thought I read wrongly...Or is it a fund-raising event? Nah...It's correct! It's just a way of 'paying back'! Cos for many of the physically disabled travel, taxi is their main form of transport. Hence, a way to 'pay back' (or is it paying it forward?) is to help the taxi drivers file their income taxes! See? A case of everyone can!
'volunteered to' can be a volunteer too!

Though we all know that companies volunteers for a reason: Social Responsibility. It's a positioning, branding or even a way to try to change customers' perception of their current postition. But whatever the motives, more often than not, these little gesture of charity will always go a long long way.

I just realized that whenever I come across articles like that, I'd secretly or softly say a THANK YOU to these companies. Companies that reach out the this special community out there. Same goes to the super-big-hearted people who go all out or even out of their way to volunteer their services, to spend all or almost all of their time trying to make this world a better one for the special community & even those who tries to protect the environment & so often, attempts to educate the clueless public about the nature all around us.

And let's not forget the caregivers, the dedicated staff, personnels who worked so hard to make so much things possible. To continue on to help fight for RIGHTS that everyone should deserve, to be a voice for the special community, and many many more. Once you're in this line, it's usually not just a job...the time that have to be spent at work (bearing in mind that these organizations are usually understaffed), the effort to make things work, the red tapes, etc...and oh-so-often the bread at the end of the month does not equate to the pails and pails of sweat for the month...(unless you've got a golden tap, that is...keke!)

I salute you, guys! And yes, I will continue to say a THANK YOU (softly & secretly) every time I read about you guys.

Can money really buy everything?

Lunch today was pretty interesting...
A new face (to me) joined us for lunch today and we talked about how money can buy everything, including love.

He's buyer/purchaser and he shared two rules to buying things...
Rule no. 1: Good things don't come cheap.
Rule no. 2: Cheap things don't come good.
(In my head, I questioned...how about at the Nike warehouse sale where some things are really cheap and good?! Haha! But these thoughts stopped at the brain, did not make it out of the mouth...keke!)

We talked about how some people would go all out and look for a RICH husband and ultimately, succeed in it...
How some NUS students would do a ‘cross-country’ and 'trek' and 'hike' all the way to the Medical Library (be it from arts & social science, business, etc) to study/hang out there just to give themselves a higher chance of getting a big (or is it rich?) catch like a doctor or a dentist to secure a 'good' future in which they can (hopefully) enjoy financial stability and of cos, eventually, financial freedom probably at a younger age than the average.

People always say that money can't buy love. Here, Mr. Buyer is telling us stories about how rich people buy their loves. Of cos, buying love is not a problem, I guess sustaining that bought love is a big headache.

But of cos, I beg to differ many of his 'theories'...Some love cant be bought...I seriously think so...
Sometimes even with lots and lots of money, the particular love that you WANT just don't come to you...Maybe others do...
Everyone knows that rubbish attracts flies...But do you like those flies? If you like them, well, then it's good for you! If you don't? ....

Just thought that it's an interesting lunch topic...Is that something that we want to do? The we want to achieve?

But by 1pm (coming to the end of lunch time), we still did a full circle by coming back to the most basic understanding.
"Aiya...Most important is to be happy la..." Haha! And that says it all! I guess if money makes you happy (and I mean happy from the heart), then maybe that's the way you should be heading towards (that's probably your Friday).

I know mine isn't.

a new Friday to look forward to...

"Work without pressure & without expectations. They are counter-productive in the end. You shouldn't force yourself to do things that others seem to do effortlessly. Everybody has their own rhythm and different levels of commitment. What's important is to go through the process and get to the point where you feel good..." -Thomas, a Swiss volunteer working at Kalighat for 14 yrs.

Just read an article from a magazine over the weekend about the 'Homes for the Destitutes & Dying' in India (started by Mother Theresa). Interesting article, it's been quite some time since I last read about Mother Theresa-related writings.

The article zoomed in on the Home at Kalighat. Many volunteers (long- or short-term) pop by to have a taste of dying (or is it life?). Volunteers from Japan who take 1 year off work to volunteer at the Home and many more short-term volunteers, mainly made up of backpackers who decided to take a few days, weeks or even months to stop by at this place. Many also stayed longer than they expected...like Thomas (the Swiss volunteer) who stayed for 14 years and still counting. It seems to me like these homes are always open, open not only to the Destitute & Dying but also to volunteers. I never knew that.

Honestly, India is a country that I'm never interested in. It's definitely not on my Top 10 list of places to visit, not even on the Top 50 (ok...maybe 49th?)...
No offence, but India just doesn't entice me! The religion scares me...The culture, I'm just not inclined to it...And the best part?! I don't take well to Indian food...Yes, I find it tough to survive even in Little India sometimes...(Personal preference, I guess...Not everyone likes Singapore...I understand)

After going through this article, I am seriously considering popping by India for the challenge...To volunteer at one of Mother Theresa's homes...

Frankly speaking, although the current job is not a very interesting one, I won't say it's a torture because of the financial independence that it provides me with (which can be achieved by working in any other job actually), and so far, it haven't got to the super-stressed up level yet. I can't deny, I quite enjoy it... =)

Maybe this is a good idea...To slog it out this year to pay off whatever that needs to be paid...To continue to slog for another year to save up...Then to take a few months off (preferably 12months! keke! but 6months will be great as well)...Go on a backpacking trip, make a detour to India & stay around for at least a month and then move on to see more places and maybe volunteer else where as well. Not a bad idea, eh?

I'd secretly be happy if the China project din go through...I'd have this Friday to look forward to ask well...
My selfish reasons...

And whoever came up with the idea of the birthday cake & blowing out candles?

So I found out from the net that the Germans were the ones who invented birthday cakes...And the Greeks may have started a similar tradition too...

Well, this is another year without a cake & a candle...Feels little weird...

But I felt less upset when I got to know that mama actually wanted to get a cake for me!
At least someone thought about it... =)

it took so long to come...but went off so fast...

After one whole year of anticipating for this supposedly special day, it finally came...and went without much people noticing. As I walked down the crowded streets, it seems just like another day for everyone, nothing special, nothing in particular...I felt so small...

I felt like going around and telling everyone that walked past me..."hey, it's my birthday! i was born on this day 24 yrs ago!" or maybe walk down the streets with a "hey!-it's-my-birthday!" tag...

Honestly, I know it isn't any important thing (at least not to everyone), it's not like I'm going to be the next president (oops, i mean president's wife la!)... =P

But it's special to ME! Keke!

As the saying goes, count your blessings; remember the little things in life; be contented; stop complaining! Haha! Yes yes, there are also a group of people out there trying to make this day special for me! Dating me out weeks before the actual, asking me to choose my pressie(s), asking me my choice of makan, surprising me with gifts, SMSes that came in like nobody's business since 12mn, bday cards that appeared on my table, just to name some of them...!

Seriously, what more could I ask for? =)

Thank you, everyone! Thank you for trying to make it special for me! Thank you for remembering me!
*touched*

p/s: gf says my previous post sounded like I won some award, thanking the whole world (or half of it)...I think I've just gotten my long-service award...It's my 24th anniversary...almost a quarter to a century! More to come, I guess! =)

The 24th year of Life

I just wrote a post, but it's too lengthy and it's not finished yet...long one...
So I thought I'd just chuck that one side 1st, continue with it another day...

Today, as I stepped into my 24th year of life, I'd like to thank many many people!

Thank you to my parents for bring me up, 24 years and all healthy & well-fed (although I look skinny, I'm well-fed, ok?! Looks can be deceiving). Thanks to my brother for always giving in to me! Haha!

Thank you to my friends around me for moulding me into who I am today! Thank you so much!

For some (you know who you are), thank you for reaching out your hands with 'S11' so willingly when I need them so desperately! It's my 1st time (hope that it'll be my last too) doing this and I am really touched by you guys! Thank you so much!

And to those who found out my problem and got more worried than me, thank you so much! I'm fine and will get through it...

Thanks to faraway friends who never forget to send me cards, letters, and even presents! Thank you so much!

Thanks to all around me! Though names are not mentioned, you should know who you are, guys...

Thanks to those who have came into/brushed past my life one way or another...Thank you so much! Some of you left some deep footprints that are still imprint somewhere in me...

Thank you so much! Please continue on to walk beside me as I look for the Fridays for this 24th year.
Of cos, I, too will walk right beside you guys as you work towards yours! =)

Happy birthday to me...

HEY, WHERE's MY CAKE & THE CANDLES?! *grrrrr...*

Fridays Of Life

i've been reading pple's blogs for quite sometime...just thought that i wouldnt want to blog cos there's just too many things that cant be posted on the the www...why? cos i cant bitch about the guy who talked too loud in the library, cos i may have done that too but did not realised (pot calling the kettle black)...i cant bitch about that friend who just poured his/her heart out to me cos he/she must have trusted me not to share these top-secret-info with anyone, let alone on the www! i cant bitch too much about the govt, the country, the way things are, the way civil servants get to rent cheap chalets using tax-payers's money, the way the TP stands at the side of orchard road with a tripod & a digicam trying to catch any vehicle whose wheel touched the bus lane...cos that i may get sued/charged? i cant bitch too much about my life, cos then i'd feel that the whole world knows what's happening to my life...i'd feel exposed, naked, and probably get weird smiles for no reason from those who read too much into my blog? and after bitching so much, i may be judged as the one who bitched too much...now you see my worries? is it just me or are the rest of you like this too? bloggers, do you allow your verbal diarrhea to flow freely? or do take charcoal pills before blogging to control the diarrhea?

too much worries maybe...time to let loose and let go...i am not usually a worrier...or am i? *rolls eyeballs and beginning to think deep* =)

i took a long time to come up with a blog name...i started a blog in 2005 with 1 or 2 entries and i tried to revive that one but i gave up when i tried to log in after the twentieth time...haha! so here i am, with the FridaysOfLife! why? well, friday is a day where energy from deep within will surface just because everyone (ok, maybe not everyone...more for those mon-fri workers...those shift workers, you have yr 'fridays' too! where the next day is your off day) is looking forward to the weekend ahead! big plans, small plans, fun plans, play plans, reading plans, cooking plans, cleaning plans, no plan! whatever plans you have, you dont usually dread the weekend, right? i thought of the SaturdaysOfLife, SundaysOfLife, WeekendsOfLife, or better stil, HOLIDAYSOFLIFE! haha! but friday feels really like a time when you have something to look forward to. whether a filled up weekend, a getaway, partying, or even just a slack weekend watching tv/vcds, you look forward to it! FridaysOfLife to me are the times in life where you live with a direction, a dream a goal, an objective...something to work towards to...and these directions, dreams, goals and objectives that you have would often be the way you've chosen to embrace your life... =) with this, i hope that everyone will each have many many Fridays in their life...

as i blog, i'm chasing after my own Fridays...searching for the Fridays i would like to dream of, those that i've forgotten, those that sometimes feel so far-fetched...as i embark on my journey towards my Fridays...